The Wisdom of this World Will Never Compare
I was not prepared! No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get it together. I was supposed to talk for 5 minutes at our district pastor’s conference. I hesitantly stepped onto stage with my mess of a note sheet. There were so many good things I wanted to say about Great Commission Women. Words of challenge and encouragement. A challenge to equip leaders. I wanted to be memorable and impactful.
This wasn’t the first year I had to speak in front of pastors, it was never this hard. Public speaking is not one of my gifts or skills. I knew I was unprepared. I was hoping God would work it out.
My talk did not go well. I didn’t make sense. All the things I wanted to say were lost in fumbling.
I was crushed. I didn’t communicate what I wanted to. And secretly I was angry that I looked like a fool.
I hate speaking in front of people because I don’t want to appear foolish. I put so much pressure on myself to get it right. I hate being incompetent or unnecessary. I like to do things I’m good at. I secretly want people to praise me and tell me how amazing I am.
But God did not make me to be praised.
He made me to be sure of him. To be confident in His power to communicate His message, regardless of the messenger.
He made me to bring Him praise.
I had lost my focus. I told myself I desired doing a good job delivering a good message. I didn’t want to admit I was seeking praise, but when it wasn’t there – When I failed – When I knew how bad I had done – I saw the reality of my heart. Instead of praising Him, I wanted praise for myself.
I got mad. I felt worthless. I questioned God – “why was I in a position where I have to do things I’m terrible at?” I felt depressed about all I was NOT.
I wanted to be clever. I wanted people to look to me for the answers.
Patiently, God reminded me that he will not share his glory. He’s reminded me that the wisdom of this world will never compare with his goodness. He whispers in my soul…
“Daughter, this is what I want for you… to leave it all behind except one thing – Christ and his sacrifice”
“I didn’t use lofty words and impressive wisdom to tell you God’s secret plan. For I decided that while I was with you I would forget everything except Jesus Christ, the one who was crucified. I came to you in weakness—timid and trembling. And my message and my preaching were very plain. Rather than using clever and persuasive speeches, I relied only on the power of the Holy Spirit. I did this so you would trust not in human wisdom but in the power of God.” 1 Cor 2:1-5
